Posted by: balizma | April 3, 2008

sit, read and cry

ok. so i do screw up articles when i am emotionally tight. i wrote one a while back on my blog and later realizd how messed up it waz cz i kept getting off track bout it.

being off track..?…even those woeds make me wonder today… am i a emotional fool?.. i do feel like one at times…

“WHY”, we know we are on the wrong track, but still proceed on it?

Why is it that our heart “ACHES” to take those roads of life our mind and body disagree to? But why do we still give in? when we have logics to conquer our minds, and wisdom to conquer the inner voice of our souls… why dont we have anyone or anything to conquer our hearts from this sickness called LOVE?

Why do i call it sickness you say?, well.. why not call i sickness for the ones who have faced heartbreaks? isn’t love a drug?as long as u have the effect of it, or shall i say as long as we are under the effect of this drug, we dont really care about how it harms us..but its only when we face or feel the post-side effects that we dispise it in the long run…

And yes, then again, isn’t love ADDICTIVE? Its so easy to adopt, and so hard to let go?… Have you ever had the feeling of being pulled apart in different directions by these unknown forces inside you? have you ever felt the immaturity of your heart? Has’nt your heart ever taken you down to those ugly emotional dungeons, where you should’nt have gone to in the first place? well, deny it.. but at sum point of the other in life, everyone does.

Why is it that, the place we never want to go, is always, and i mean always the place our heart most wants to wonder off to?

its said – “Our first love and last love is self love.”

it is when our heart comes back to where it truly belongs. back to us. but our heart, which always flutters like butterflies in spring, seems to find it self another reason to leave its cage and wonder off again… till we get hurt and it bleeds back to us.

this reminds me of a poem i wrote long back.. – ‘colors remind me of you’ went sum thing like this:

Blue winds blow,

over the brown ground.

and makes me remember,

the time we went around.

all those sleepless nights in my bed,

i spent remembering the days,

we spent painting the town red.

Under the shade of the green trees,

just you, and me and nobody.

i thought that was how my life would end.

lost in the colors of love we had blend.

I picture the Grey storm,

pushing the ship at sea.

like the invisible differences created between you and me.

I look at the vast sky so blue,

and wished i have never ever liked you.

i see the tulips bleed in pink,

and regret…

that i shunt have ever had this loves drink.

.the end.

(to be cont.)


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